What driving to the shops would be like if your car was run by an Operating system

• MS-DOS....You get in the car and try to remember which key you need.

• Windows 3.0...You get in the car and drive to the shops VERY slowly because attached to the rear of the car is a freight train

• Windows NT...You get in the car and write a letter that says "go to the shops". You then get out of the car and post the letter to the dashboard.

• OS/2....After filling the car with 6000 gallons of fuel, you get in and drive to the shops with a motorcycle escort and marching band in procession. Halfway there the car blows up, killing everybody.

• UNIX...You get in the car and type "grep SHOPS » pg > /dev/hft0". After reaching speeds of 200 mph en route you arrive at the theatre.

• OS/400...The car locks you inside and when you arrive at the shops you can watch everybody else go shopping.

• MVS...You start the car with the starting handle, get in and wait for the man with the red flag to turn up.